i'll forever be a four year old.

im so stoked for the day. just because it's another day.

yesterday morning, i started out my day by waking up early to go for a run (inside mind you, because it was 9 degrees out). it was a short-run day, so those are always nice. runs in the morning usually start my day off well. especially when it gets nicer, when winter mixes with spring, and the sun begins to gradually come up earlier, and earlier, and the entire run is a new exploration of God's beauty. i have a very specific memory from a run last spring, probably late march or early april. i got up at 645am, brushed my teeth (because im insanely particular about making it the first thing i do when i get up) put on my white fleece, headphones in, and started off toward University drive listening to some acoustic pop goodness thanks to Bethany Dillon. i ran out towards the airport, running up and around the hills by the farms, waving to the cows like i always do, and as i was nearing the crescent of a hill, "Let Your Light Shine" came on, and the new bright sun poked out from the top of it, shining all of it's white and gold goodness over all of creation. it was a perfect placing of the elements. it was like God was saying, "Here I Am. Let's run together." so, naturally, i obliged. ;) 

i had a similar moment yesterday morning after my run, as i was heading to school. to give my self more time, i take the T to school in the morning , which is Boston's version of the Subway. i waited in the station for the next train to come, and as i saw two light emerging from the tunnel, i noticed that this train was one of the most full id ever seen. it was unreal. everyone pressed against the glass and the doors, everyone way to close for comfort. anyways, i was dreading getting on, because i jsut didn't want to be all up in a strangers face that early in the morning. ive had some experiences. like monday for example. i was sitting, and a boy got on right after me, stood directly in front of me, and his fly was down. it was the most impossible thing to not burst out laughing. and i laugh a lot. and loudly. i should get an award for my composure. i kept smiling and burying my face in my scarf....but anyways, back to yesterday.

the train came to a stop and i noticed that there were some people getting off in the very first car of the train, right next to the driver. i stepped on, and stood on the stairs, holding the rail to my right, and peeped my head out over the wall to my right to look out the windshield. i thought that i should entertain my brain for a little while, at least for these 6 minutes. the driver looked out her mirrors, closed the doors and we slowly pulled away. i kept my gaze fixed straight ahead, peering down the tunnel, watching the other trains pass to my left, and turn out of sight. i would have love to have seen the simple wonder in my eyes in this moment. i have never felt like more of a child then in that moment. those moments when your a little girl, or boy, and you just take it all in. your first plane ride. your first trip to the zoo. the first time you see your baby sister. your first train ride. i couldn't believe the joy i was getting out of watching the train move faster and faster down the tunnel! i wasnt a 20 year old music student, i was a four year old toddler, on her first train ride, not wanting it to end. i wanted to catch up with the track ahead of me, zoom down the tunnel and discover what was surprises it had. it was such a Jesus thing. He wanted to share it with me.  He knows my heart better than anyone. He knows that i like the little things. He knows the things that will make me happy even when i dont. like this train ride. i am filled with joy just thinking about it.

mornings are one of my favorite things. and today, ive started out things on another wonderfully high note. in my apartment building, we get free coffee and food from starbucks. free coffee fridays are their title now. so naturally getting out of bed wasn't so hard today;)

i hope that you will be able to experience moments of being a child like i did the other day. jsut be with Him. He'll captivate you. body, mind, and soul. 

loveyoubunches!

Anna=]

Fears and Romances, Gentle Hands and Slowdances.

what a beautiful picture-a romance with Jesus. it's such a strange concept to understand. mostly because its something that is felt, not so much explained. but how wonderful it is to know that He desires us. He desires us. to feel it. to see a broken glass, that was once flawless and filled, overflowing even, be patiently picked up, and carefully and gently put back together with gentle hands. to see the glass put together, but still cracked, become sealed and smooth by His hands. to see restoration. to see the glass become strong, refillable, and now, it has become something stronger than just a mere drinking glass, but a pot, made of strong, sturdy clay, with only a small opening at the top for it to be filled. what a wonderful thing to see the Potter hold it in His hands, pleased and proud, exited and captivated by what he so patiently waited for. He was patient. and waited. and now He is rejoicing in what they can share together.

how good He is, and how much do we not deserve His goodness. His patience. His love. 

the parallel between the potter and the clay to the Father and His child has been one that has taken a new meaning for me this year. it is far more than being directed. it is allowing Him to shape us. allowing Him to heal us. but the part that i am struck by most is how patiently He waits. how He waited for me. He let me take my course, and slowly revealed more parts of Himself, and my own heart, knowing what i could take, and what i couldn't. recognizing my heart as fragile and precious, He pursued me, and waited for me. 

but this isn't a circumstantial issue. it is our lifetime. a lifetime of a pursuit. a lifetime of a divine romance. i'm the luckiest girl alive. =]

Born to Fly.

I've been telling my dreams to the scarecrow

about the places that I'd like to see

I say, friend to you think i'll ever get there?

and he just stands there smilin' back at me

so i confessed my sins to the preacher

about the love i've been prayin' to find

is there a brown eyed boy in my future

and he says, girl you've got nothin but time

sarah evans. ive rediscovered my love for country music. especially when songs can help tell your story. 

in other news, apparently, pandas are repopulating in the woods of my backyard. i had a dream last night, where for some reason or another, i was running away from something, and ended up going into the woods to run away from it (perfectly nonsensical thing to do for a scary movie) and then when i got there, there were pandas everywhere. i mean everywhere! liek thousands of black and white furballs rolling around the pine needles and chewing on sticks, being protected by their superelhugo mommy panda bears which, when they saw me, began to charge at me, and then just out of no where, they poofed. when they got to close that is. all the babies were fine because they were very content just chewing on things like babies do. but the mommas-man watch out. but it was so weird! like i had this insanely good panda bear repellent. dreams are so awkward. i mean, i dont even remember the last time i saw a picture of a panda bear let alone a real one. 

classes are going great. and im discovering that this is what school and learning is supposed to be like! its not half as painful to listen in class when its about training your ear and understanding how to work with the entire ensebmle, or listening to performances and critiquing them. really. i loved penn state, but this is just so much more fun  =] so loryn way, you need to come into my ear training class for a period-then were even. i loathe economics, and then im pretty sure you'll loate eartraining. concerning classes- my schedule was slightly terrible for a while, but it's all fallen into place and i'm pretty stoked about it. i picked up principals of business management, so that ya know, in my ideal perfect life, i can open up my bakery/cafe with a stage in the corner, and studio in the basement, and let kids come in and get their feet wet in the studio. i mean, in some far away perfect alternative lifestyle. ;)

im going to take some pictures of mass ave this coming week, so you can see the "berklee beach". it's pretty crazy. and you cant walk down the street without seeing someone you know. everyone here is so social. well here as in berklee... bostonians on the other hand. i've decided they find it inapporopirate to smile in public. so in most scenarios, i stick out like a sore thumb. but, it's my mission everyday to brighten someone elses day, make then laugh, and in most cases, because its just the way my life naturally flows, it happens out of me doing something completely mindless and goofy, which wasnt even meant to be funny. eh-such is my life. =]

one of the friends that ive made since ive been here is a singer songwriter, with a really soulfull voice.... but he doesnt even go here. he lives in nashville. he is a friend of taras (my roomate) and we started video chatting and last night we wrote some stuff together. it sounds pretty sweet. acoustic guitar is by far my favorite. and its in almost every song i listen to, so performing at berklee makes things harder, because there are only pianos in the labs, but-that gives me a more well rounded education, right? sure. anyways-back to the song. its actually more of a prayer. which is how a lot of the stuff is i write.  it's to God. talking to Him. so anyways, it was the first time i really put my heart out there in my music, so im exited to see how it sounds. tara keeps bugging me to put up a music myspace.....so maybe ill get on that soon. =]

as for now, im gonna go run. and listen to sarah evans. because we have the same brain. 

loveyoubunchesbye!

my heart skipped a beat on more than one occasion today.

im sitting on my futon,

and my feet dont touch the ground.

it's not even a tall futon.

anyways-concerning my skipped heart beats and near death experiences.

today, i was painfully owned by Berklee and then it reedeemed itself, all in the same day. a one of a kind school i assure you. so, the first skipped heart beat was the result of a new course i am taking, or was taking rather. let me explain. i was told that this course was a "basic" guitar skills class for the non-guitarprincipal... well friends-an understatement to say the least. what it actually is is basic guitar performance  skills for the non-guitar principal. which means, all the kids taht are doing music business, songwriting, film scoring, what have you, but still play guitar. may i remind you that it's berklee, so naturally theyre all very experienced guitarists. and this class doesnt teach you guitar basics, it teaches you how to perform them. well, i checked out the class anyways, to see what it would be like, and when i got there asked the teacher what i could expect from teh course and what i should be able to do in order to do well, explaining to him my background (uhhh, i can play G? and the basics. but still. pretty much useless) and he sort of answered my question in that annoying round about way... and then class started. story isnt over. out of all people to continually call on in the class for answers....me. its like he was trying to kick me out of the class. not a very nice man. well, he was nice. which was weird. i debated making him cookies. and when i say debated i mean, it poppped up in my mind like one of those mole games. but remember, im good at beating inanimate objects, so i quickly pounded the cookie eating mole with my mallet. 

win.

with that said, im dropping guitar performance skilled, and hopefully picking up principals of business management. that is neat.

the second time my heart skipped a beat was outside of the 15o building today. i saw a kid with his guitar on his back (surprise surprise) and for a split second, it was phil wickham. then reality set in, and it wasnt. some strangely distant realative. but still. phil is the man.

the third time my heart skipped a beat i was inside the 150 building, and i saw that kid again.

one day. one day it really will be phil wickham. by the way, if you havent listened to his music yet, do it. his Singalong album is fantastic- he's best live. simply nothing, acoustic and vocals. thats all. brilliant, simple, worship. 

so, berklee owned me via GuitarPerfSkills, but toootally redeemed itself (name that movie plug. i'll send you a pixie stick) in my last class of the day- Background Singing. um, can i get a woopwoop for background singing!?!! and my teacher? ahem- his name is Jamale. and seriously awesome. we just grooved and talked, and he was really stoked to be working with us. it was just fun. a good ending to a semi annoying day. 

oh. i did however have another near hour conversation with someone today. it's relentless. but good. i dont' mind one bit of it. we talked about how he didnt understand how if no one has ever even heard of the name Jesus, how can they believe, and if He is the only way, how is that fair? these are the kinds of questions that our society asks aaallll the time, and i told him a few times throughout the conversation that i simply dont have all the answers for him. i'll continue to seek and learn, but i ask for your prayer. for myself, that the Lord would continually reveal to me the ways in which He sees things, and how I can then explain that to others. and most of all, please pray for all of the people here. the people that God has created are all so wonderful and unique, and i am so exited to get to know them. 

loveyoubunches=]

87 Days.

87 days until the Boston Marathon. im getting exited.

theres a countdown in a running shop across from the finish line on boylston that i pass every day. that ones for you daddy. =]

so remember that pop/rock/country lab i was so stoked about for today? yea, not so stoked anymore. turns out that its basically a performance class...which isn't so bad, but its a full out performance in front of only your class. which is 10 people. im not kidding. since i have been little, small groups and singing freak me out. they just always have. its more intimate, more seemingly judgemental. something i need to let go of, because they are my own ideas and inhibitions about the situation. but at any rate, i am required (for this class) to prepare and memorize a pop/rock/country piece every week, with sheet music for the pianist. it's like mini-american idol. oh Heaven help me. it just seems so different for me becuase all eyes are on me, and on the song.... it's so different than what i am used to, and what i want to do. but even in CCM i'll need to balance performance with worship.... but i know that it will be great experience for me. Berklee is going to do that in so many ways for me...prepare me and make me a much better musician all around, which is why im here. wow anna, way to state the obvious.........

my vocal lesson was great. ive only taken 6 lessons before coming here, and they were in the summer. she was a great teacher, and i learned a lot in just those 6 sessions. my vocal coach this semester is super nice. i sang At Last by Etta James for her just so she would get to know how my voice was. i had never sang it before then, but it was fun, and went pretty smoothly considering. its encouraging to know that everyone here is here for music. and when im on the 3rd floor of the 1140 building, everyone is pretty much there for voice. i feel like i can let loose a little more, because everyone else is doing the same thing. its pretty neat if i do say so myself.

last night, i had yet another opportunity to talk about faith with someone. my roomate and i had a friend come over for a movie night. we watched across the universe, which was very good by the way, and then afterwards, i dont even know how it came up, but we started talking about faith and why he(our friend) decided that he could call himself agnostic more than anything really. at first he said he was catholic. then jewish. i was confused. but he said something that really struck me. he said that he wasnt sure of an afterlife, and in all honesty, didnt care that much. so in that case, whatever choices he was presented with here on earth, he was going to choose whatever it was that made him happy.... my heart just broke when he said that! throughout our entire conversation i was just asking for wisdom, and for the Lord to place words into my mouth to say to him, but in the end i just told him very simply what i stood for, in and inviting and loving way. we both agreed on some things, like how the division of Christianity is sort of annoying, but in all reality, if you know who God is, know He died to save your life, loves you, and you love Him??? then i'm a pretty happy camper, and we can discuss the other things. 

but if you think of my friend pray. all of my friends really. but i get along really well with this kid, and the deep conversation started so quickly, so i know that we can talk more. i dont want to "convert" anyone. that's not what my life is about. i want to love them, and through that i want them to discover that there really is something bigger and better than the things here, which i too have very much experienced,  only bring empty living. so it sounds sort of flowerchildish, with all my love talk, but just pray for a softening of hearts here. and continual experiences like those of last night. i am only close with one Christian girl here (who is completely awesome and her placing in my life is 100% by the hand of God, but i'll talk about her later =] ) my enitre life as it is right now is a complete and total, very obvious, mission field.  i am so exited of how my Jesus is using me. and so exited for what He has in store for His people here. pray for the lost. 

loveyoubunches =]

Rock N Roll.

if he wants to rock he rocks

if he wants to roll he rolls

he can roll with the punches 

long as he feels like he's in control

if he wants to stay he stays

if he wants to go he goes

he doesnt care how he gets there

long as he gets somewhere he knows.

eric hutchinson. boom. outta here.

so. i have been very spoiled. there is a gym in the very next building to mine, so i am very quickly becoming friends with the guys at the front desk..because i go a lot. i may or may not loose it if i didnt exercise. dont believe me? have you seen my "dance pants" video on facebook? that my friends is the fine, fine product of Anna deprived of running for a long amount of time. ahem-back to subject. i woke up early this morning to go running, and as i was running, about halfway through a man wearing a blue shirt came into my peripheral vision. i just kept running, listening to Merideth Andrew's new album, but was very quickly distracted. this guy, my inspiration for the day, and probably a constant reminder in my life, was blind. blind. first of all, kudos to him for working out. second, he's blind, and making his way to an arc trainer machine himself--he's in a gym, without anyone to explain things to him,, the only thing he has with him is his stick. i watched him pass in front of me, his right hand sliding over the right side of one machine, then the left, right, left, right left, until he finally found the machine he wanted to use, and folded up his stick. at that point i began to look ahead again and thought about it for a while, admiring his diligence, and then went back into my zone. a few minutes later, he got off of his machine, pulled out his stick (im sorry if there is an actual name for them... im just ignorant.) and walked past me, making his way to the paper towels and sanatizers. 

this is where God swooped in, in all His gentle mysteriousness and creativity, and opened my eyes. i am an extreeeemely visional person, so i know, without a doubt, that He places things in my life, both in my mind and my daily occurences, to help make sense of things. 

i watched the red pole wave left to right as he moved forward, and i was in awe. he has complete and total faith in it. he walks boldly. he trusts himself with the end of that stick. and if it should come in contact with some sort of object in front of him, hes warned, and slows down, and moves out of the way. the whole analogy of the faith of a blind man became so much more real to me. imagine if we truly lived our lives with the faith of a blind man. like our Father was the end of that pole, always guiding, looking out, protecting, steering us in the right and wrong directions, and we walked very boldly, completely trusting, behind it. now imagine if the blind man held his walking stick by his side, and continued to walk. how would he know where to go? how would he know what to avoid? how could he be protected? i think that this is an insanely simple, yet perfect analogy of how we try to live our lives. Jesus is at the end of the pole, being our fearless leader, and we are trying to be right next to Him. how does that make any sense whatsoever? we're only going to cause ourselves a lot of hurt, and a lot of confusion. what if we truly had the faith of a blind man, and werent in control, and werent sure we knew of where we were going? i just love the fact that i am a visual learner-its makes for insanely instructive people watching.

as for school--its a pretty unreal experience. Berklee is located (mainly) on Massachusetts Ave. there are a few other buildings, with a group of them on the very next block on the intersecting street. the entire section of massave on this block is overflowing with skinny jeans, thick rimmed glasses, emo/urban hats, starbucks cups, guitars on backs, and truth be told, a lot-ALOT of cigarettes. Berklee totally dominates this section of Boston. it's like pollock or curtain road. except every single person is a musician. it's the coolest experience. as for my classes? the ones i've had so far are probably some of the most dry i'll have while im here, but i am still so iterested! for some of these kids, im sure they're hating it because they've already learned most of it. for me...well liek i said, in all actuallity, im musically retarded. so far i've had writing skills (which is just a class on how to actually write music, which i already know a lot of, but i'm still learning more.) ear training one, and harmony one--which will be extremely influential classes for me, so im pretty stoked to take them. i have intro to music tech tomorrow, my vocal lesson, and writing skills again. on friday i have my pop/rock/country lab, which i am so so stoked about, and then on monday, amongst other classes, im starting my ensemble with my friend tara from santa barbra--that is neat=]

also-im trying to find a way to work as a volunteer at the childrens hospital down the stree. so if you think of it pray---i have this vision of using the friends i have here at Berklee to play music for the kids there. if all i can do it chill with them, watch cartoons or do crafts, thats cool too. but as far as i know, there arent any programs that Berklee has which do that, and i think that music is something that they would just love. music is a relational business.

wonderful isn't it?

Frodo goes to Mordor, Anna goes to Boston.

welp, today, i did absolutely nothing.

my printer and i are currently caught up in a rather heated tiff..... he's redeculous. so now im royally miffed. 

i have a talent for defeating in animate objects however, so dont worry.

kudos to dad for the title. 

loveyoubunchesbye!